New York to Nashville

Dreams are meant to be followed. That is what I realized during this pandemic. After I graduated with my bachelor’s degree in Music Industry I had no idea what I was going to do. Many people told me as I was graduating from high school that I shouldn’t go into music because the success rate was very low, but nothing could have prepared me for this. However, I knew from a young age this was what I wanted to do so I've made a plan. I remember in middle school at the end of my eighth grade year I had a meeting with my guidance counselor and I asked her what classes I needed to take to get into a music engineering program. She couldn’t help but laugh. After all, I was a girl from a small school with a below-average music program and zero music technology courses. There had only been one alum from my school that attempted the sound engineer path and she hadn’t heard from him assuming that he wasn’t successful. But after many minutes of explaining that I was serious about my inquiry she gave me the list of classes I needed to take to even be considered at a college with an engineering program.

From that point, every step I made was toward that goal. I had always had an interest in writing songs, but to be honest at fourteen with no mentor all of my songs were pretty bad. But I had fun writing them and so kept at it in the privacy of my bedroom. My passion for music only grew over the next few years. Early on in my life, my interest in the possibility of pursuing music as a career path started in my mom's bar. I was nine when she opened for the first time and it was like I was living a double life.

Making myself comfortable in the corner with a Sherly Temple on a barstool I would watch completely mesmerized. I loved seeing how happy people were and I quickly noticed it wasn’t completely due to the alcohol. The music is what makes a party. I spent every Friday and Saturday night up until two or three in the morning listening to some of the best bands in the North Country and plotting my road to fame. At nine, fame meant that I would play in a bar like my mom’s someday. I wish I could tell a nine-year-old me that I’m “famous” now according to her definition.

My mother’s bar closed when I was twelve and that was around the time I started writing legitimate songs and not just small tunes. I missed the experience of being raised in a bar and the excitement of watching the drama of a small town unfold and so I put all those memories into songs so I could relive that crazy part of my life over and over again every time I sang them. And then one day my mom opened the bar again when I was sixteen. Now between the ages between twelve and sixteen, a lot happened musically for me. Another local dive bar called the Barking Spider was holding open mic nights and my mother thought after years of singing alone in my room it would be a great time to go public. Now I must emphasize this was a 21 plus place in a small town so as a fourteen-year-old I was extremely nervous to be singing in front of people that knew me when I was nine. All I could think about is all the embarrassing things I did. Ugh *facepalm* But this was the moment that hooked me. I got up with my guitar and I sang a cover of “Before He Cheats” by the wonderful Carrie Underwood. My songwriting wasn’t quite there yet for me to feel comfortable singing an original. The whole bar full of tough biker dude, hippies, and rednecks fell silent as I sang and a week later I got a call from the fanciest restaurant in town asking if I would play a one hour set on a Wednesday night. My first gig. And that was it. I knew this was what I was meant to do.

Circling back to May of 2020. I’ve just finished my degree from my childhood bedroom and oh, yeah a pandemic is forcing people to stay in their homes and businesses to lay off employees or just shut down completely. I didn’t know what my future looked like. I had planned to move to Tennessee either directly to Nashville or in Memphis with my older, very generous sister. But I didn’t have any money and no promise of a job in a new state so I felt stuck. Even my regular summer job couldn’t take me back because financially they couldn’t afford it. So I felt completely out of options. As it is in small towns, jobs are limited and even more during a pandemic. Luckily I finally found a job serving soft-serve ice cream and working to-go orders at another local restaurant. Unlike many musicians in my area, I was able to strike up a deal with the restaurant, where I have gigged before the pandemic, that after my shift I played for three hours for my hourly wage plus an extra fifty dollars. It wasn’t close to what I normally would make, but for three hours I didn’t have to sling soft ice cream or take orders from people who had zero cell phone service.

As much as I didn’t like that job I was grateful for it because it allowed me the freedom to think about moving to Tennessee. They laid me off at the end of October and spent two months doing nothing when it hit me that I can sit in New York doing nothing at my parent’s house or do nothing and live with my sister in Memphis. In December I decided that I was moving in February and now I’m one week out from leaving and I’m so excited and also extremely anxious. I’ve always been attached to my one-stop sign town and the characters that I’ve met over the years. My friends in college used to make fun of me for talking about how much I love my hometown, but I had such a uniquely fun upbringing that how could I not? I’m leaving behind a lot of things that bring me joy. My family of course, but my pets, luckily I get to bring my cat (who is adorable) which does ease my nerves a bit, and my best friend and her kids that I love more than I ever thought I could love children that did not belong to me.

My adorable cat Coal

With all that being said I have so much to look forward to. I get to live with my sister, who I haven’t ever actually got to live with full time which I am very excited about. I foresee a lot of Law and Order Criminal Intent and many fits of laughter that make our stomachs hurt. I’ve applied to what feels like a billion music industry jobs that either I haven’t heard from and if I have it’s been to reject me, which is not reassuring. However, I do know what I am good at which is songwriting and I’ve decided that I’m going to throw everything I’ve got into following my dream of being a songwriter in Nashville while I wait on a job offer. I’ve spent too much time focused on this “dream job” as some sort of record label executive or artist manager when all I’ve ever wanted to do is write songs for some of the most talented musicians in country music. So I’m ready. I’m ready to just jump in and follow that dream that has been so important to me all these years. I’m moving. Wish me luck!

- Sara